Be Gone, Dreary Housewife!

Tonight, I am wearing high heels. I am putting my sweats aside, bypassing the jeans, opting away from my teacher shoes, pushing past my t-shirts and sweater sets, and I am wearing a skirt and a shirt that qualifies as a blouse. I am wearing a necklace with matching earrings. I am actually going to brush my hair into a nice ponytail and not the regular bird's nest that is on my head.

I will also be wearing control top pantyhose underneath a body-shaping Spanx and a tummy tightening tank top. Since my body's not right and tight anymore (literally), I gotta fake it somehow.

Hello Christmas party, Elizabeth Ellis is coming to you looking like the pre-baby-ish version of herself.

Separation Anxiety

Last week I went on a trip to Oklahoma to see my brother graduate from college. What an enormous accomplishment for Woody! I'm definitely a proud big sister!

I went to Oklahoma without Nyla because, let's be honest, what a nightmare having an almost-2-year-old on an airplane flight for a three day trip. So Paul and I decided she would stay home and I would go by  myself. Secretly in my head, I was saying "YES!" I could hear the George Michael song in my head: "Freeedooooommmm...FREEEEEDOOOOOMMMM." :)

Thursday morning, I headed out to the airport with my parents and aunt and uncle. It was about then that I started to get a little itchy about being gone. Then we sat down in our seats on the flight and I was getting extremely itchy about it. It's not that I don't trust Paul at home with Nyla; he's a wonderful father! I just was starting to feel extremely apprehensive about being away from my girl.

When the airplane began to push back from the gate, I started to cry. My apprehensions got the best of me and I waved my white flag: I was going to miss Nyla and part of me was terrified that something was going to happen to her or to me while I was gone.

I was sitting in row 17B (middle seat) and I was really trying to hold it together. I had one guy to the right of me at the window seat and then another man on the other side of me whose wife and children were across the aisle. And then there was me, tears streaming down my face. I was blotting my tears with my scarf and trying to maintain some sort of dignity through this crying episode.

Mr. Window saw me crying out of the corner of his eye and promptly turned his entire body so that he was straight up facing the window. Mr. Family Guy kept making "crying" hand signals to his wife and pointing at me. I'm relatively certain I made those two men uncomfortable, but I didn't care. You guys, I couldn't stop crying! I cried all through taxiing, takeoff, and 15 minutes into the flight...a good 30-40 minutes of crying.

Thankfully I was able to get through the rest of the trip episode-free. Whew! It was just that initial, "OMG-I'm-leaving-Nyla-and-something-might-happen-what-if-she-needs-me" freakout. After that, I was good to go!

I'm thinking she'll go with me on our next trip though...I missed my sweet girl!

Our Singer

Miss Nyla sang her first song today from memory...part of a song, at least. She sang the letters A through G today in the car. Clear as day, she just sang them out from her car seat!

I can't even begin to express to you how overly excited I got about this. My child, Nyla Ellis, terror of our house, animal monkey savage child, sang the first part of the alphabet un-prompted! We didn't have to sing the song to get her going, we didn't have to ask her to sing it for us. She just started to sing it to the other cars on the road.

My angel is growing up. Today she's singing the alphabet, tomorrow she's asking for money from her father. Awww...

It's a Pants-less Party

A week or two ago, I thought to myself, "Nyla should be self-sufficient. She should be able to take her own clothes off when we change into our jammies." I am now regretting that decision to teach her those skills. Homegirl now loves to take off her pants. LOVES it.

Case in point: $1 taco night on Tuesday. We went to the Mexican spot in Tigard and had tacos. Nyla happily had a grilled cheese and fries and then wandered around our table, people watching. Paul and I are talking to my parents, just visiting, and I saw her out of the corner of my eye. Miss Nyla was standing in the middle of the restaurant pulling her pants down. She pulls her shirt halfway up her tummy and then starts to fervently pull at the waistband of her pants. What do you do, but laugh and try to convince a 20-month-old to keep her pants on?

Let's just hope this little pants-less phase doesn't last into college.

School Pictures

Nyla had her school pictures taken a few weeks ago and we just got them today. Can you say adorable? 

Hey guys.

Now don't think that Paul or I did her hair. If we would have "done" her hair, it would look all amazonian and jungle, curling in all directions and falling into her face. Thankfully our girl loves for her teachers to do her hair, so they happily put it in pigtails for us. 

You look at that picture, look at it real closely. She almost looks angelic, like she could do no wrong. DO NOT BE FOOLED. That is the face of a monkey girl who loves to taunt and torment her parents and her dog. 

But alas, I adore her immensely. This school picture will take a place of honor in our home. It will be our constant reminder, especially when homegirl is acting up, that she is our little angel. 

Who Needs Wipes?

I had to take Nyla to an appointment today. I picked her up from daycare and she had just, literally JUST, had her diaper changed and we were heading straight to the doctor's office. When we got to the office, I started gathering my 8,000 things that I would need while we're there: snacks, toys, a book, a spare diaper, sweater (in case it was cold), a short sleeved shirt (in case it was hot). I was prepared.  My bag was chock full of distractions for Nyla and the last thing that I would have needed to grab were wipes. The only thing of wipes I had in the car was a massive bag of them...the bag that is filled with wipes that you use to refill your regular wipe-distributor. Great.

I stupidly thought to myself, "I won't need wipes. She won't poop...she just had her diaper changed." Guess what the first thing homegirl did when we got to the office was? Pooped.

Of course she would poop. Why have I not learned this yet? When in doubt, Elizabeth, take a hundred of whatever you are doubting. I should have lugged that whole damn thing of wipes in with me, all 475 wipes. But no, I decided against it and I was punished...again.

When will I ever learn?

**No, I didn't just let her marinate in her poo. I cleaned her up using regular ol' toilet paper...and it broke when I was wiping her, thus getting poop on my fingers. Day #602 of getting poop on my fingers. Seriously, I am not made to change diapers.**

Terrible 2's? How about Terrible 19 Months?

Let's talk about homegirl for a second, okay? Miss Thing has hit her stride with throwing tantrums. Her favorite thing to do? Throw herself face first into her chair and let her legs fly up in the air all while she's trying her damnedest to cry with *actual* tears. I love when I catch her mid-cry, looking at me like, "Is she watching?"

Even her daycare has noticed that Miss Nyla is...dramatic. She comes by that honestly from, ahem, me. But her level of dramatics is far superior to mine. I'm one to have a little fit when I don't get my way, then I realize that I'm a grown woman, and I put on my big girl pants, and move on with the day. Nyla will hold onto her fit for hours...HOURS. It's like once the bad mood starts, there is no end in sight. Everything is cry-worthy: socks on the floor, Okie not giving her a kiss, the teddy bear is upside down, she doesn't have enough broccoli on her plate...I put that last one in there so that you all know that I feed my daughter vegetables. :)

She might be a hellion, but she's our little hellion. And we like her just as she is.

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's Johnny

Tantrums

Our child is growing up. She is learning new things. New things that aren't always great for her to learn. For example, Miss Thang has learned how to throw a tantrum. We're thinking she picked this up from other kids, because she just started doing it out of the blue one day.

If you take something from Nyla that she's not supposed to have, like a rock, her tantrum follows. She will drop to her knees, lie flat on her stomach and start to cry, face-down on the floor. And not a cute little baby cry; it's a disgusting, shrilly, tongue-hanging-out cry. No tears, though.

That's her trick--she makes you think she's crying, so when you pick her up you realize there were no tears. But homegirl has gotten her way and now you're holding the baby. Hmph.

Mommy needs to put on her big girl pants and get down and dirty with this parenting thing. Say goodbye to sweet, doting, overnurturing Elizabeth Ellis--here comes Rambo Elizabeth, ready to parent and teach and be strong in my will to raise a respectable citizen of this country...with a few (million) kisses along the way :)

Bouncy Bouncy Bouncy

Now that Nyla is super mobile, she loves to chase Okie around the house. Wherever Okie goes, Nyla follows. I think Okie is amused by this, but I'm not sure. Sometimes she has this look:

Mom. Please.

But for the most part, Okie is a happy girl. She's got someone to be partners with, someone to get into trouble with, someone to feed her Mac N' Cheese. These two!

I think Okie has one thing she's not a fan of: bouncing. Nyla loves to bounce on her. Nyla will take her 26-pound body and bounce on Okie's stomach, on her head, on her feet, grabbing her tail and bouncing on her butt. And how can you tell Nyla to stop when she's screaming and laughing with such joy?! Nyla does redeem herself though; after her little bouncing-fest, she turns to Okie and gives her a kiss. It's pretty sweet. Then she kisses Okie again...and again...probably four times. We all know that when Nyla kisses, it's like she's trying to eat your face. So when Okie gets a kiss from her, it's full open-mouth, tongue lagging out. And Nyla won't close her mouth until Okiedoodle starts to lick Nyla's face. Gross.

Wow

Someone find me a sweater set! I'm turning into my mother!

Today I went to the tulip field with Nyla and my mom...and LOVED it! We had so much fun! We didn't do anything but walk up and down the rows of tulips, but it was great! The weather was awesome, there wasn't a ridiculous amount of people...it was just wonderful. But the best part for me was seeing my Nyla enjoy herself and swat at all the flowers.

We came home, ate lunch, and I did the unthinkable: I gardened. I physically planted flowers in the ground. By nature, I'm not a very garden-y person--I'm not know for my green thumbness. But today, I was feeling the inspiration! And of course, I had my Nylabelle with me as my little helper. "Helper" is the operative word here; she spent most of the time sitting on my newly planted florals.

All in all, even though I realize that slowly but surely turning into Kat, it was a wonderful day!

Joining the Ranks

I've officially joined the ranks of parents who flock to child-friendly

Ego Boost

This morning, I went into Nyla's room to wake her up. She looked so peaceful, lying in her crib, mouth open, belly hanging out, spread eagle, just off in lala land. It's painful waking her up because she looks so stinkin' adorable! But alas, mommy has to go to work, so awake she must be.

"Nylaaaaaaaaaaa." It's annoying how I call her name in the morning, but she likes it so I keep it going.

"Nylaaaaaaaaaaa" and usually by the second call, she wakes up. This morning trumped every morning up until now. She opened her sleepy eyes, stretched her arms up, started slowly rolling around her crib. She then stood up and grabbed onto the rails, looked up at me and said, "pretty pretty." The first words out of her mouth this morning were the best compliment in the world to me! In general, the only things she thinks are "pretty pretty" are earrings, Okie, and flowers. But this morning, mama joined that illustrious list of "pretty pretty" things. Love it!

I'm a Mess

So I thought that I would be totally fine dropping Nyla off at daycare on a daily basis. The first two weeks of work, things went great; I just dropped her off, gave her kisses, and was able to go on my merry way to work. The last two days have been awful for me! I have cried while driving away both days.  I didn't expect this to happen so long after she came into our lives. I mean, in the early months, it was expected for me to have some separation issues and to be a little teary. But 13 months later? And it seems like the tears are from out of nowhere.

I think it's because I realized that my time with her is so limited now. I stayed home with her for the better part of her first year of life; she was my buddy, my partner, my little sidekick. And now, no sidekick. No pal. No sweet thing during the day. That makes me sad. Yesterday morning, I was able to see her awake for a whopping 22 minutes, and that includes driving time to daycare!

And you know what made things worse? I dumped my full cup of coffee in my car. So not only was I crying over my baby, I also was crying over my Starbucks! Yesterday just was not a shining day for me.

What I do know is that my time at home with her at night is all about Miss Nyla. I walk in the door and we snuggle and kiss. She's only awake a few hours until it's her bedtime, so I try to get in as much Nyla-Mommy time as possible. Well, Nyla-Mommy-Daddy-Okie time really.

It's One or the Other

You can never get two things at once with Nyla. You either get one or the other.

Perfect example: this morning. Nyla slept through the night last night! Yes, we're still dealing with that. 13 months later, we're still having a little trouble with sleep. Not as much now that she's in daycare, but still having some wakeups in the middle of the night. Anyhoo, last night she killed it with sleep! Right on! This morning, I started my job at full time, so I needed time to get up and get dressed before waking her up. This is her "one or the other" moment.

I got out of bed to start getting ready, thinking that she wouldn't wake up for another half an hour or so. WRONG. Homegirl woke up and started talking just as my feet hit the ground. Instead of having a relaxing and quiet time for me to actually brush my hair and do my makeup, I now had to rush and had a little voice sqauwking at me, reminding me that she was awake. It's one or the other with her. Either take a full night's sleep or get time in the morning to get ready in peace. I can't have both, damnit.

In conclusion, if you see me out in public looking a little disheveled and out of sorts, don't worry. My child slept all night so I'm good!

ps: I missed writing my blog! So we're back! Welcome to the second year of mommyhood.

Nyla's Second Year So Far

So it's been a week since Nyla turned 1, and her birthday party was so fun! Lots of laughs, lots of food, lots of taking pictures of her eating a cupcake. Nyla was all about the frosting! It was super adorable!

But enough of the mushy stuff, let's talk about what's happened since she's turned 1:

1. She went to her yearly checkup and received 5 shots. Do you know what a child who just got poked in the thigh five times sounds like? It's deafening.

2. Also at the appointment, we learned that she is 31 inches long and 24lbs11oz. Our child is officially bigger than a standard Thanksgiving turkey.

3. She's slept through the night...once. Don't get me started.

4. She has a rash from drooling so much underneath her lips. Basically, she looks like a 12-year-old going through puberty on her chin...red bumps everywhere. Gross. Yes, I just said that part of my daughter is gross. Sue me.

5. We have expanded her food substantially. Now she won't eat her pureed food as much. She's all about sharing with you or with everyone. And she begs worse than Okie. If you're eating, Nyla will literally stand right next to you with her mouth open and leaning toward you. I will try to capture a picture next time.

6. And just today, we've started her drinking milk...cow's milk, as the pediatrician says. I'm nervous to do this since she's been on soy formula forever, but the doctor says it'll be all good so...real milk it is! We also got a mild shaming when we told our pediatrician that we put Nyla to bed with a bottle.

7. Also today, Nyla watched her first episode of Barney...and loved it. L.O.V.E.D. it! I'm thinking Paul will love this new chapter of her life. "I love youuuu, you love meeee.."


Here we go, into our second year of life with Miss Thing!

Birthday Wish: Granted

Homegirl is now 1-year-old. She enjoyed a lovely party with family, only missing my in-laws! BUT we're doing a 2nd party with them next weekend! Nyla will be happy because she will be able to devour another cupcake. See video below.

364 Days

What a difference a year makes. Hello, look at the pictures below! The one on the top is Nyla at 14 days old. The one on the bottom was taken yesterday, which would make Nyla 364 days old. Ridiculous!
            
                                
Look at how humongous she's gotten! Look at how different she looks! Look at how, over the course of a year, I still haven't learned to do my hair! :)

My Nyla's birthday is tomorrow. Mommy is going to be teary, I can tell.

When We Found Out

Well, as we come around to Nyla's first birthday, I better recount the night we found out we were pregnant so that it's documented somewhere for our girl in the future.

June 2010 was a big month for us. We moved to Lincoln City, both of us started new jobs, and we were loving living next to the ocean. Paul and I had been trying to get pregnant for over a year and it wasn't happening at all. There were a few false hopes, months where my period was late, but when those tests came back negative, I was devastated. I cannot accurately describe my sadness when we weren't pregnant. But Lincoln City was a new place for us and a new beginning! Who knew what could happen?

As we started into July, I started waking up in the middle of the night for a week straight feeling like dog doo. I literally had to talk myself out of barfing on Paul next to me. Seven nights in a row of nausea and fully-focused deep breathing. I would have thought something of it, but the nausea just disappeared.

A week later, my breasts were so sore. Okay, there's sore like there's a bruise on you; this soreness was ridiculous. I was almost in tears. That's right, I was ready to cry over my boobs. You would have thought I would have started picking up on these little changes in my body, but no. I think I was in denial and not wanting to get my hopes up. Then the tell-tale signs started showing: no period, nails growing extra fast and strong, senses heightened. I think inside, I knew I was pregnant.

Paul wanted me to take a test, but I couldn't do it. I just couldn't face a negative again. Even though I had a strong inkling I was pregnant, I didn't want to even consider being wrong. But Paul came home one night with tests and we decided to go for it.

I wouldn't let Paul in the bathroom with me. Before I went in, I told him, "Okay, let's prepare for a negative." Do you know that three minutes is a very long time when waiting for a pregnancy test to turn? At first, the negative line started to show. I felt the tears, I felt the desperation, I felt the depression coming.

And then my world flipped as the plus sign started to show through.

"Paul, give me that box." He says he knew right then. Talk about your world changing in an instant! For me, it was like the whole world tilted, everything was different immediately. I think we ended up taking seven tests over a few days just to be sure, since the doctor only saw pregnant women after 10 weeks.

When we told our families, we were about seven weeks along. The rest is history. 33 weeks flew by (except for the last three or four), and now here we are. Our babygirl is almost 1 and life is sweet.

*Now y'all. Don't be getting your hopes up about us having another one anytime soon. Everyone can pump their brakes about that.

Owning The Shame

Okay, here's the truth. I'm still wearing nursing bras. Yes, the bras with the snap down flap...still wearing them. I haven't nursed Nyla since she was six months. Hello, she's turning 1 on Thursday. Time to put away the nursing bras.

When does "ooh I feel so sexy?" come back? When does the desire to be super fabulous with my undergarments come back? I am making progress, though. Almost everyday I put on my makeup! I don't wear my pajamas until noon like I did at the beginning of this adventure! Now I need to take the next step and put back on some cute bras...or at least bras that don't have four inches of padding and a drop-top.

But here's the thing. I nursed Nyla. Nursing nipples look like something that should be on National Geographic. The last thing I need are my NatGeo nipples to be sticking out in public, which I think is my rationalization to myself for continuing to wear nursing bras.

I will persevere though; nursing bras, be gone (tomorrow)!

The Germ Addict

I think Nyla is addicted to germs. There are three things that Nyla will undoubtedly find in any room, whether it's empty or chock-full of people:

1. The garbage can
2. Any electrical outlets
3. The sickest kid in the room

Inevitably, Nyla is able to search out these things no matter where we are. The library is her favorite place to find these three things. It's like there are magnetic force fields around garbage cans and outlets and she is just drawn to them. I can't even count how many times I have to bring her away from them. And don't even get me started on sick kids in public. The other day, Nyla managed to make friends with the illness-infested child. Never mind there were six other toddlers there that she could have socialized with; she had to be with the sick kid. Gross.

My favorite blogger, Scary Mommy, said it best with her Valentine's Day card:

She's Fine

The other day, Nyla decided it would be great to pee through her diaper and three layers of clothes. Cool.

When we got home, I grabbed my pee-drenched child and decided it was time for a bath. I stripped her down while the bath was filling and she ran around naked for a minute or two. Sidenote: can I tell you how cute her buns are?! Don't think I'm a predator or anything, but her thighs and buns are BEYOND adorable. I'm obsessed.

So into the bath Nyla goes, and things are going just fine. She's playing with her rubber duckies, splashing in the water, and laughing. I reached down to grab the baby shampoo, and out of nowhere, Nyla stood up in the bath. She stood all the way up, then flexed her knees, and began to pee. As if she hadn't peed enough in her clothes, she needed to also pee in the bath.

Homegirl stood up, peed, then sat right down in it. Lovely. Did I drain the water out and refill the tub? Hell no! I just added a little more shampoo/baby soap and lathered her up real good. I mean, she's fine right? The water dilutes it anyway, and it's just formula-and-apple-juice pee. She's fine.

Nyla's Favorite Song

Last night, Miss Nyla woke up at 4 a.m. and decided to stay up for a little bit. No big deal, other than mommy was ridiculously tired...but whatever. Are my needs even important anymore? No.

Getting back to the story, she really only stayed awake for about a half an hour before she closed her finger in between two pages of a book. That was enough to hurt her a little, although I think it was her tiredness that really was the issue. She burst out in tears and I swooped in and snuggled with her. I grabbed our favorite blanket, a little pillow, and we sat in the rocking chair. She was a squirmy-wormy until I started to sing her favorite song--"Jingle Bells."

My sweet thing loves "Jingle Bells" more than any nursery rhyme in the universe. She knocked out immediately once I started singing! Whew! I took her back up to bed, and she was out! Love it!

Admitting Is The First Step

Homegirl is almost 1-year-old and still not sleeping through the night consistently. There, I said it. I am owning it and admitting it.

"Oh my child is 5 months and is sleeping 12 hours a night. It's such a beautiful thing. I don't know how I could go on without the sleep." It's statements like these that make me want to bodyslam people. Apparently it's not a very normal thing that a baby who is almost a toddler isn't sleeping through the night. But at least we're not like we used to be: wake up, play for three hours, then back asleep. Now she wakes up, we change her buns, and give her a bottle, and *poof* back to sleep.

And yes, we let her have her bottle in bed. I can already feel the scornful looks from you mothers who are against this. But you know what? At 3:30 in the morning, I am in no mood to bottle feed Nyla. I love my child, desperately. But I swear the day she learned to hold a bottle by herself was the best day of my life. It will only be trumped when she is potty-trained.

So we've got about two weeks until Nyla turns 1..don't even get me started on that subject! But here comes 14 days, and in those 14 days, I'd like to get this sleeping business under control. I doubt that's in Nyla's agenda though. We will see!

The Pack-N-Play

Nyla has a new favorite habit: she loves to throw things out of her Pack-N-Play. She loves to launch her toys across the room. Who would've known that babies can throw so well?

Her favorite time to unload her area is in the morning. She sits to drink her juice and I think she starts to strategically plan out her throws. Within ten minutes, she has the whole living room strewn with toys, blankets, teddy bears, and books. She likes having so much stuff with her just so she can chuck it out onto the floor.

It's all good though, because her second favorite thing to do is pick everything up and give it to me. Nyla just loves picking up stuff, one by one, and bringing them to me (or whoever is with her). She will pick up anything just to bring it to someone, and within a very short time, you will have a two-foot stack of stuff next to you. From there, it's my job to put the stuff away. At least she's considerate enough to bring all the stuff back.

Hopefully This Won't Last

Our morning routine is the following: Nyla wakes up, I go to change her diaper, and then she hangs out in her Pack-N-Play and drinks some juice. She is still wearing her pajamas because we don't change those until after she eats breakfast, just in case feeding time is disastrous. 

The other morning, she had on her two-piece pajama set and was happily playing by herself. Then the monster came out and she was not amused to be in her Pack-N-Play. "Nyla, let me finish washing these dishes and then I'll get you" I called to her. Apparently she didn't like this answer at all, because when I got over to her, she had kicked her pants off. She was so irritated, she took off her pants.

Let's hope this isn't a little habit that she carries through her life. I can just see it: she'll be in 1st grade, a kid will get on her nerves, and homegirl will take her pants off and be ready to fight. *sigh* What am I going to do with this girl? 

I Thought She Liked To Read

You know, common sense is apparently not my strong suit. I think to myself, "Oh, Nyla really likes to read and look at these wonderful cardboard books that she can't tear! Let's get her some of these." This little idea worked for a few months. Then Miss Thing learned how to chew books and gnaw pieces off.

Now we have a whole litter of books that look like this:

And those missing pieces off of the books? She eats them. If we don't pay super close attention to her, she will completely mush the cardboard and swallow it, which is followed by some super dramatic coughing and a regurgitation of the book. Mmm...nummy.

I guess it's time to find an alternative to these cardboard books. The library has these Indestructible Books brand that we may have to try.

Her Favorite Things

Like Okie, we have taught our daughter some tricks to do to impress people. Yes, I am comparing our daughter to our dog. They know similar tricks! Here is a list of Nyla's favorite things to do on a daily basis, including some of her tricks:

1. Roll over onto her back and chew on her toes
2. High five*
3. Sit down (on command)*
4. Give kiss*
5. Hold hands*
6. Walking, almost running, away from mommy
7. Climbing up stairs
8. Speaking words: mama, baba, baby, pretty (really just comes out ppppttttfffsshshhh, but I understand)
9. Sliding downstairs
10. Pulling out all the pots and pans, slamming them around, and then leaving them all over the house
11. Standing at the windows giving herself kisses...needless to say, there are tongue and lip marks on all the windows at about the 36" height
12. Hiding our cell phones

Oh, the asterisk denotes that Okie can do those tricks too! See, we love our girls!

Slow Down, Life

I just cannot believe that 11 months have gone by since we welcomed Nylabelle into this world. In 30 days, she is going to turn 1. It's impossible for me to wrap my head around this. I feel like it was just yesterday that she was born; but then again, it seems like lightyears ago that we were brand-new parents with a 2-week-old baby. It was just yesterday that I was waddling around with a humongous belly, but I can't really remember being pregnant (if that makes sense). All those sleepless nights were difficult and long to endure, but now looking back, I feel like I blinked once and she was grown.

I don't want my life to go by this fast with her. I don't want our lives to go by like this. We're going to turn around and she's going to be going to kindergarten. I feel like I waited for Nyla forever, and now that she's here, life is just going to fly by. That's not fair. I get very teary when I think about how fast this year has gone and how fast our lives will inevitably go. I just need to remember to stay in the moment with our little family.

The Problem With Think-Alizing

Hmph. Grumpy Mommy doesn't really cover what I am today. Our sweet girl (I say "sweet" loosely) wasn't having anything to do with sleeping last night. We put her down around 9:30 and she did okay. Did I go to sleep? No. I was having a hell of a time falling asleep last night. I should have taken that as a premonition of what was to come.

Then it was a midnight wake up and she didn't want to go back to sleep just with rocking. I, on the other hand, rocked myself to sleep and was awoken by Nylabelle slapping me on the face. Isn't she sweet?

Okay, new strategy: bottle!  That didn't work either. It was time for me to pull out the big guns: the projector and music! We went into her room and I turned her projector on, put her in her crib, and I climbed into the spare bed in her room. I just lay there perfectly still and she seemed to respond well to me just being in the room. She would pop up from time to time to make sure that I was still there, but for the most part, she was laying down. I thought to myself, "Ah, I'm home free!"

Therein lies the mistake. I feel like my motto about life is this: when you verbalize (or think-alize) something, it will not come true.

Not even an hour later, she was up and crying...again. There comes a time where a mother must know when to surrender. I put up my white flag and pulled her into bed with me. She knocked out! I mean, O-U-T, down for the count, asleep. "Oh yes, Elizabeth! She's going to sleep forever!" There I go again, think-alizing. Guess who was up at 7:14am trying to crawl all over? Miss Thang.

Needless to say, Mommy is tired.

PS: yes, I understand that think-alize is not a word. Let's just be humorous about it.

Awkward

Our girl has an innate ability to make people feel kind of awkward. Last night at dinner at Shari's, Nyla wanted to walk to every table and just stare at people. She would literally just stand there and stare; no smile, no waving, nothing. She just stood at their table and stared at them.

The people at first were like, "Oh you're so cute! Hi baby! Hi sweetie!" But after 30 very awkward seconds of no reaction, they would casually turn back to their dinner. Did Nyla move? No. Just stood perfectly still and continued to stare. What a weirdo! I love it!

Nyla in public is a sight to see, for sure. She walks, she grabs things, she tries to put everything in her mouth, and she laughs. That is until someone notices her, then she turns into a statue. And the look on her face says, "Oh, puh-leeeze."

Our WWE Star

Last night, I tried something new with Nyla at bedtime. Usually we put her to sleep with a bottle then transfer her to her crib. Now that homegirl is pushing 25 pounds, she's getting a little heavy to transfer down to her mattress. Last night when she finished her bottled, she wasn't all the way asleep; she just had drowsy eyes and was mumbling to herself. So I thought to myself, "Okay Elizabeth, let's put her in her crib and just lay down on the bed in the room." I turned on her projector and put her in her crib. She cried a little bit, but I kept my cool and just relaxed on the bed that's in her room. She realized that I was still in the room and calmed down and started to watch the projection. And then, our WWE star emerged.

All of a sudden, she was rolling all over her crib. Nyla went from being perfectly still to this roly-poly of an animal. She was turning over onto her back and putting her toes on the top rail of the crib. She would drop them, then furiously roll to the other side and stand up and start to bounce in her crib. Side to side, she was making her way all the way around her crib, pushing her mattress, pulling at the bumpers, sitting up on her knees then falling backwards and bouncing on her back. The whole time she was talking talking talking! She was just too funny.

I think when she gets into a real bed, we're going to have to make it a wrestling ring. Watch out, world! SummerSlam 2031 is going to be a good one! :)

Dreams Do Come True!

Last night Nyla slept for 13 hours...13 HOURS. She isn't feeling 100% and last night around 6:30, she started having an all-out breakdown. Crying, fussy, just in a stinky mood. I thought that I would rock her in the chair and she would fall asleep. That worked! I thought that she would sleep for maybe an hour

Still Counting

For the 328th day in a row, I got poop on my fingers while changing Nyla's diaper.

That pretty much sums up our lives together. Happy Thursday everyone!

Dirty Looks

Okay, moms of Baby Reading Time at the library. I was late today! Get over it and stop giving me dirty looks! "Oh look at that pathetic mom. She's late! Ugh, disrupting my 6-week-old's developing reading skills time." Get over yourself and your child. He just barfed on his blanket.

Today was the first time we went to Baby Reading Time at our library, and it really was fun! Nyla loved it and had a good time. I was a whopping three minutes late and was looked at like I had just interrupted the President speaking. Hello, I'm sorry. You all should understand! Thankfully, after the momentary side-eyes I was getting from everyone, they all went back to playing with their babies.

Since it was our first time, I felt like an idiot. Everyone else knew the words to the songs. Everyone else knew the movements/actions you were supposed to do with your baby. Everyone else seemed to know exactly what to do at what moment, except for me. I was lost. So on top of being late, I was also wrong with my moves and my song lyrics and my vocal tone. Disastrous. There is literally nothing more diminishing of one's spirit than not participating at the standard, you know? I felt great about being there; I was happy and excited to play with Nyla and listen to a story with her. But once the songs and movements started and everyone knew it but me, I felt the size of an ant and wanted to run for cover.

Thankfully the lady leading the group was really kind and didn't make me feel like a moron at all. And really, it's not about me is it? It's about my Nylabelle and she walked around and played with other kids and had a great time. That's the important part for me! Next week, though, I'll be on-time and prepared and ready to fa-la-la-la with all of them.

Here's the thing, though: when everyone was reading or singing along with the leader and their baby, I felt like I was among alien lifeforms. They were all speaking in baby tones and giggling and like in the zone with their baby. I mean a full circle of 15 or so adults just in a trance with their child. I felt like they were almost possessed by baby-ness. Am I supposed to be this way? Creeeeeeeeeeepy. I love Nyla, but I guess I just express it in a different way.

Rear-ended

Before I get started on this, I should tell you that all are safe and sound, especially our Nylabelle.

Tonight, for the first time ever in my life, I was rear-ended. Paul, Nyla, and I were in the car driving to the library for some evening energy-spending time when we were hit by a car from behind. On a positive side, it wasn't at a ridiculous speed. But let me tell you, the inner lioness in me came out.

I was driving, and having never been in an accident before, I was in a state of shock when the car hit us. Paul was damn near out of the car already as I was pulling over to the side. I turned to Paul and matter-of-factly said, "Okay, don't be mad at them." These are words I should have directed at myself because at that moment, I peeled off my seatbelt, flew my door open, and screamed, "WE HAVE A BABY IN HERE!" I. Was. Pissed.

A long story short, the girl didn't say anything about why she hit us. She was pregnant so I'll give it up to pregnancy brain, but I bet homegirl was texting someone. Grrrrr. I gathered her information but refused to talk to her because I was so mad. Thankfully Paul is able to be the reasonable, sensible half of us because he was communicating with the girl. I, on the other hand, was fuming. FUMING.

After the whole scenario on the side of the road was over, we drove off and I started to cry. In an instant, all of these questions flooded my mind: What if Nyla had been hurt? What if she is hurt? What would have happened if her car seat wasn't on right? Is her car seat on right? What if she's not breathing right now? Every possible scenario came into mind. Thankfully, my girl is fine and well and happily played all over the house tonight when we got home.

I literally never EVER want to be rear-ended again. It's these type of things that scare me and make me not want to leave the house with Nyla. Of course I cannot be a hermit and there are things that are out of my control in life. It's just scary! What if something worse would have happened? My mommy fears are still lingering, I see.

How Did That Get There?

Nyla is now eating Cheerios. She's actually been eating them for a few weeks now, learning to chew and not just shovel and swallow her food. Of course, when Okie hears me get the Cheerios box, she comes running and politely sits next to Nyla, waiting for her share. These two!

Now, I know that Nyla sometimes can drop some of her snack because there will be four or five of them in her high chair when I get her out. Sometimes they're stuck to her buns, sometimes to her face. I've found them on her belly, underneath her chin (lol)...I've found Cheerios everywhere! But this is a new one.

On Monday, I changed her diaper before putting her down for a nap and when I opened her diaper, *tada* there was a cheerio in her buttcrack. A CHEERIO IN HER BUTTCRACK. I am at a loss for words. How in the hell did a Cheerio get into her diaper, into her buns no less? She has clothes on, most of the time a onesie with pants over it. It's not like she can figure out how to put them in her diaper. I mean, the Cheerio would have to maneuver its way down under her shirt, down through her pants and into a diaper, shimmy its way to her buns, and settle there. I just am dumbfounded.

And this isn't the only time it has happened; later that day, *tada* another Cheerio in the diaper! The next day, I found multiple Cheerios in there. What is going on?! Now it's a regular thing to find Cheerios in her diaper.

But I guess I should be grateful that it's nothing distressing. It's not like she's shoving them up her nose or anything. *knockonwood*

Stroller Derby

I will never go to the mall in the morning again. Especially not right when it opens because the Mall Walkers are there. You know, the Mall Walkers. The people who actively wake up in the morning, get their athletic gear on, and parade around the mall at warp speed. The average age of a Mall Walker is 77, but there is a growing population: people with babies.

At Washington Square this morning, within the first five minutes, I passed eight people with strollers. EIGHT. Apparently I don't know Mall Walkers' etiquette because I was getting the side-eye from everyone. Maybe I was on the wrong side of the walkway? Maybe I wasn't walking fast enough? I had Nyla in her stroller and thought I was doing fine. But I felt like I was in bumper strollers! These parents come straight at you like sharks with their strollers aimed like torpedoes. I had to dodge over 20 stroller-pushing people! They are walking like maniacs and will damn near run over anyone, including a fellow stroller-pusher like me!

And you know who I hate the most out of the Mall Walking Society of people? The two women today who, while they passed right next to me, sneered and gave me the up-and-down look. You know what, you two overachieving Mall Walkers? You are not all that, you and your yoga pants and Asics shoes.  Stop giving people dirty looks and move on with your parade. I am happy to just be strolling with my Nylabelle, thank you.

Going Above And Beyond

Paul and I are doing what it takes to get this girl comfortable in her bed so she'll sleep. Yesterday, we set off for Babies R Us and found her a fleece crib sheet that is super soft and snuggly. Then it was to Target for the baby radio that plays lullabies and also projects images of cartoon animals on the ceiling. Love it! The radio has different sounds; the weirdest one is definitely the heartbeat. I could see how it is soothing to a baby, but coming through our monitors in our room is kind of creepy.

I would literally stand on my head for 10 minutes every night if it would ensure that she would sleep all night. I would damn near do anything if it meant that she would sleep. Thankfully, for the time being, it seems like our new additions to her room are just what she needed. She slept all night last night! Woohoo!

**OFF TOPIC**
PS: Have you guys ever watched that Nickelodeon show "Fresh Beat Band"? That is literally THE worst of them. Ugh. Of course, being an English teacher, my favorite show is the OPB show "Word World" where they spell things and make them into shapes. I'm going to mold Nyla into a nerd, I think. 

I Need A Superpower

If I had to pick one superpower, I would select the ability to transport myself...silently.

When Nyla goes to sleep, her ability to wake up at sounds is wholly dependent on what is going on when she actually falls asleep. If people are talking and the television is on, she'll sleep through anything. But at night, it's generally quiet in the house. This means that any slight noise, no matter how quiet, will arouse Nyla from her sleep. She will literally wake up to a pin dropping.

I've decided that I need the ability to either levitate myself and slide out of a room, or I need to be able to transport myself at the blink of an eye. There's nothing more frustrating than successfully putting Nyla in her crib, only to have her wake up when I start to creep out of the room. I've tried to memorize where the creeks are in the floor, but sometimes I forget and that's the trigger. *creeeeeeeeeeeeek* Nyla's awake. Damnit.

I think I'm averaging four tries before I can finally escape her room! That's four times of rocking, four times moving into her room, four times laying her down in her crib, four times of patting her back, and four attempts at slipping out of the room like a cat. Sometimes I can get her down in three, sometimes I give up after five. Grrrrrrrr...

Nylabelle, I'm begging you. Let's just sleep tonight. All night.

Rawr

Okay, who turned our child's voice into an animal growl? Homegirl now no longer calls "mama" in a pretty, girly voice. She no longer cries like a normal baby does, with a constant note to her voice. Now Nyla screams and talks in a high-pitched growl. If you've never heard it, it's something special. I keep trying to catch it on video, but when she sees the camera, she stops and starts laughing. She takes after her mama that way. :)

But seriously, there's nothing like having a calm baby morph into The Hulk and start screaming "MAAAAAAMAAAAAA" with a gruff tone to it. Imagine a newly awakened bear coming out of hibernation, stretching and saying "mama." That's a pretty accurate description of our Nylabelle's voice right now. It's rough and rugged and has a little throttle to it. How ladylike.

Whoa, Flexible.

The other day in the car, I thought to myself, "Wow, Nyla is really quiet. I bet she's asleep." Since Paul was driving, I was able to turn around and take a little look at my girl. Homegirl was not asleep; she had managed (in the sitting position) to bring her entire foot up and put it in her mouth. This little position is just impossible for me to even understand. She just looked completely comfortable and had no issues with doing this. And she's concerned for sanitary issues: she takes off her socks before putting her feet in her mouth. What a good girl!

I turned to Paul:

me: Paul, I dare you to try to put your foot in your mouth and hold it there for ten seconds.


Paul: Um, no. I couldn't breathe.


me: Me neither. 

Don't judge us for being inflexible. You try putting your foot in your mouth and holding it there for an extended amount of time. It's hard!

I don't understand how babies are so flexible. When we change her diaper, Nyla likes to grab her feet again and put them both in her mouth. Talk about flexible! This means that the whole time I'm changing her diaper, I'm trying to avoid getting full-on sprayed with pee or salad-shooting poop.

I'm calling Cirque-du-Soleil. She's got a future with them.

Nyla and Okie Sitting In a Tree

These two girls are just peas in a pod! Okie has officially taken to Nyla and our girls are definitely friends. Since Nyla has learned to walk, she is constantly trying to chase Okie around the house. What a sport Okie is, she will just sit down wherever she is and let Nyla crawl all over her.

We knew our Okiedoodle would be a great big sister! Okie will lie on the ground and Nyla uses her as her own personal jungle gym. Over and back on Okie, pulling her tail, patting her head, trying to bite her nose, rolling up against her, slapping her back, crawling underneath her. These are the things Nyla most likes to do with Okie. And when Okie has had enough, she politely stands up and walks away. That doesn't mean that Nyla gives up though. She just crawls or stumbles toward Okie again to start it all over. It's pretty sweet when they interact.

PS: When I say Nyla is walking, I use the word "walk" loosely. It's more like an all-night drunk stumble type of walk, complete with frequent grabs for support and falls. Nyla also likes to run into things (walls, plants, stairs) because she hasn't figured out how to stop. That sounds like my 20's.

Shouldn't Practice Make Perfect?

You would think that after almost 10 months of multiple daily diaper changes, I would be perfect at getting it done in a timely and tidy manner. That is not the case. Especially with #2 diapers.

Why is it that I still get poop on my fingers when I change her diaper? I make sure to be careful, too! I cover my fingers/hand with the wipe and look before wiping. But still, there will inevitably be poop on my fingers. Curses! I even lift Nyla's legs all the way up so I can see almost to her back to make sure that the area I am going to wipe will be the only poo-infested area. But it never fails: I have the perfect swipe, and Nyla randomly tries to roll over, thus covering my fingers in doo-doo. Lovely.

I think I need to start wearing a Hazmat suit or something when I change her diaper. That seems like the only feasible way for me to stay poo-free during diaper changes.

One Moment

The last 9.5 months which were filled with every emotion under the sun, especially stress, frustration, and irritability, were eclipsed and erased last night in the middle of the night with one sweet moment.

Nyla had started crying in her crib again around 1:30 in the morning. No shocker there. I went to get her and put her in bed with us (I've given in for the time being since she's sick). We put our heads down on the bed to go back to sleep, and then it happened. Nyla rolled her whole body up to mine and put her arm/hand around my neck and breathed a total sigh of relief and comfort. Just that moment, right there, erased all the negative anything from the last months since she was born.

I can honestly say that little timespan with her wrapped around me was the best moment of my life. It was wonderful! This must be what parents are talking about when they say parenting is great! Parenting isn't all it's cracked up to be; the snuggling is, though! No parent enjoys the crying in the store or being trapped in a car with a fussy baby. No parent likes being barfed on or having to massage their child's anus to get him/her to take a dump. NO ONE LIKES THAT. But every parent loves those special snuggling moments! That is just the best feeling in the world.

Now Nylabelle, don't take this to mean that I would like to repeat all of the last 9.5 months. Let's keep our snuggle train moving forward please.

Miss Thang Is Trying To Walk

Make note of it: we have started 2012 with our monkey taking her first steps! At 9.5 months, our girl has decided that she would like to try walking. Whoa, whoa, whoa Nyla. This is a bit early! But alas, she doesn't care. She tries to walk from the couch to the chairs, from her table to the cabinets, from here to there. She is definitely trying to walk.

It's pretty cute. She can solidly take one step and stand, but anything after that is pretty disastrous. Now you're probably thinking, "Uh, Elizabeth. She's not walking, she's stumbling." But no, she is honest to God walking. She stands up, puts her arms out like she's walking a tight rope, sticks her tongue out in determination, and boldly takes a step. She smiles when she's able to stay standing without wobbling. But then she tries to take another step and it's all over.

Wasn't it just yesterday that I was getting excited about her rolling over? Slow down time...

The Humidifier

Since Uncle Woody is home, we have Nyla in our room now, crib and all. We won't even get started on how disastrous that is with us trying to get into bed silently. But since Nyla has been sick the last two days, we've had to have the humidifier in our room too. Holy humidity.

When you walk into our room now, you are transported into the middle of a bedroom jungle where it is 9,000 degrees and sweaty. Gross. It feels like we are sleeping in the middle of a rainforest. And it gets more humid by the minute! Bleh.

There is an upside. Since Nyla also got Mommy sick this time, both of us are breathing better at night. That's a good thing. Paul and I are also sweating to death...but whatever. It's all so our monkeygirl can feel better soon.

I'm not going to hope for a full night's sleep tonight...or the next few nights. Grrrr.....

Whoever Gave Nyla This Cold...

If I find out who gave Nyla this little sniffly nose and sneezes and coughs, I'm going to hit them in the genitals. A sick baby is just the worst. THE worst. Homegirl can't breathe through her nose, isn't sleeping, super grumpy during the day, fever going, nose running. It's just disgusting. And I feel so bad for her! My little monkey girl isn't feeling good...again!

Doesn't it seem like she's been sick a bunch of times? This is like the third or fourth time she's gotten a little cold. Bleh. But I researched online and more than one source said that babies and toddlers get sick between six and 10 times a year. 10 times a year! I can't imagine doing this no-sleep, no-breathing thing almost once a month!

Well, there is an upside to her being sick: I'm getting lots of snuggly time! Miss Nyla is very fond of falling asleep in my arms and snuggling when she's sick. Usually she's okay with doing a two-minute snuggle then wants to be left alone. But when she's not feeling good, all she wants to do is be with mama! YES! I love that part! I just wish I could have the snuggles without the boogers running down her nose and onto my shirt. Heinous.